09/28/2024
I can't stand seeing Bonnie in this condition! She is in so much pain and with the pain meds they have her on, she can't communicate with anyone with any rational thoughts. It tears my heart so see her in this condition and me not being able to do anything about it. I am trying to be strong, but I am not as strong as I thought I was I guess.
She had back surgery 4 weeks ago and now she has a pinched nerve in her back that sends shooting pains and "Charlie Horses" though her right leg. She also has an infection from the 1st surgery on her back where they went in from the front and the infection is making it impossible to deal with the nerve pain so she has been in the hospital for a week so they can keep her on Morphine and Narco to ease the pain. I worry about her becoming dependent on the pain medications. I also have to work to pay the bills and when I do, no one is with her to watch over her and her care.
We had friends that were helping, but right now none of them are available to help so I feel helpless when I am working and can't be with her. Right now she can't even walk to get out of the bed. I have never felt so helpless in my life. She doesn't even know where she is most of the time.
To top it off my father was also put in the hospital to have surgery on burn he received when he fell into a fire he built on the property. He is currently in Herman Memorial Burn Unit and I can't even help him. The house is so empty because I am the only one left to take care of the dogs, cats, chickens, work and Bonnie etc.
I just ask for the Doctors to find a way for me to get my wife back.